The Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Morning

Wednesday morning, William woke up at 5:45 a.m. He was still tired and didn't really want to be awake, so he immediately started crying. Daddy got him milk and tried to calm him down by letting him watch TV while sitting on Mommy's and Daddy's bed, but the tears kept coming. Then Mommy picked William up to change his diaper and found his diaper had leaked and the bed was wet. She had to strip the sheets and change William's diaper with William crying some more. When Daddy had to leave for work, William began to cry even harder. He wanted Daddy to stay with him. Mommy got herself dressed and then tried to get William to think about something else by picking out his clothes for the day. He said he wanted to wear a dinosaur shirt, but he did not want to get dressed. Instead, he began to cry and roll on the floor, saying that he wanted to play. Mommy left him in his room so she could go make herself some tea and start the laundry. When she went back upstairs to get him dressed, she was able to get William's pants on, but not his dinosaur shirt. He started crying some more, with more rolling on the floor. So Mommy went back downstairs to make her lunch and William's breakfast. A little bit later, she heard William crying, "Milk. Milk." When she went to check on him again, he was sitting half-way down the stairs. She asked if he was ready to put his shirt on, and he responded with "Milk" and threw up the milk that had curdled in his belly from all of his crying. Mommy, who was wearing her Ann Taylor suit for Meet Your Teacher Night, told William not to touch her as she picked him up and carried him, with curdled milk running down his chin, neck, chest, and pooling on his pants and diaper, to the bathroom. She stripped him and put him in the bathtub and washed off the milk. While he sat in the tub, she cleaned the milk off of the bath room floor, and then proceded to try to clean up the curdled milk and bile that were in puddles in the hallway, in the entrance of William's bedroom, and the entrance to Mommy and Daddy's bedroom, and all on the two year old white carpet. She then got William out of the tub, dried off, re-diapered, re-dressed, and out the door to drop him off at pre-school. He was fine at school, sipping his apple juice, and waving good-bye to Mommy as she handed him off to his teacher with a quick explanation of the morning's events. Mommy then made the drive to school and signed in right on time.

That afternoon, Mommy and William finished the laundry. Then it was time for Mommy to go to school for Meet Your Teacher Night, so Daddy and William went on a scavenger hunt to find pet stain and odor remover to get the rancid milk smell out of the carpet. When Mommy got home at 9:45, she sprayed the carpet so that the next morning, there was no more sign of the terrible, horrible, no good, very bad morning.